Posted by: nichole | September 26, 2008

Accepting change

Change is one of the hardest things to accept. And sometimes, actually most times, no matter what we do to stop it, change occurs anyway.

Is change inevitable? Maybe but we can never know for sure in what or whom. Or when it will come.

For most of us, the reason change is so difficult is that we feel it upsets our balance. I would say it ties to expectations.

I remember when I first separated from my ex-husband. There were a number of reasons why I didn’t want the separation or subsequent divorce. Nonetheless, it was change. A big change. Just as big as when we got married. One change, the first in getting married, I was ready for. I prepared for it for months. I thought about and looked forward to not only the actual wedding but the idea of living together, and being married. The change that came with the separation and divorce was more sudden.

I never had a time to prepare for it. I could say this is a typical trait of mine. I like to be in control. Often, I have to be in control. But some things we can’t control. And change is one of them.

So what do we do when we can’t control change? I think the first step, as with anything, is in knowing we can’t. Accepting we can’t. Then what?

We accept change. We are better people if we fully embrace it. And one major lesson I have learned is that when we choose to embrace it, we should not lose our “happy place.”

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